A Holy Habitation: A Funeral Homily for Jim Ghioto
A theme that runs through our scripture lessons today is one of dwelling, habitation, and security. When it came time to choose a psalm for today, Sharon didn’t hesitate one bit. Psalm 91 was the one she wanted, and for good reason. Sharon has clearly prayed this psalm many, many times in her life, and it still brings her comfort in the midst of struggle.
In the very first line, we encounter this theme of dwelling, habitation, and security when the psalmist declares, “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High, abides under the shadow of the Almighty.” And it goes on to say, “You are my refuge and my stronghold, my God in whom I put my trust.”
The psalmist isn’t telling us that if we believe in and follow God, that our lives will be easy, and free from heartbreak. Rather, he is saying that when we encounter the difficulties that life brings us, we have a God who calls us to dwell in his shelter and abide under the shadow cast by God’s infinite, expansive love. And within this shadow of the Almighty, in the midst of our struggles, we find refuge and strength.
Later in the psalm, the image of refuge is expanded to that of a mother hen, covering her chicks under her wings for warmth and protection. Given the fact that every person in this life will at some point experience pain, suffering, and heartbreak, I can only imagine, when the psalmist says that when we make the Lord our refuge and the Most High our habitation, that no evil or plague shall happen to us, he can only mean the evil of total separation from God. Otherwise, this psalm wouldn’t be true for anyone, even Jesus himself, who suffered evil. I am confident that Jim, in the midst of the joys and tragedies of his 82 years of life, including his long illness, he never felt separated from God. And Sharon’s abiding presence helped remind him of that.
During the time I have come to know Sharon and Jim since they moved here in November of 2021, I have experienced their home as a place of refuge, even in the midst of Jim’s declining health. Sharon created a space of love, nurture, and refuge for Jim to live the last 18 months of his life. She was embodying the “steadfast love of the Lord [that] never ceases, [whose] mercies never come to an end” which we heard from in the reading from Lamentations. Sharon, you and Jim both courageously and faithfully modeled what we heard from Lamentations, that “The Lord is good to those who wait for him. It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.” Jim’s illness was prolonged and debilitating. But you never quit caring for him, and he never quit graciously receiving your care. He always knew that he was abiding under the shadow of your loving, caring wings, while you both were abiding under the Lord’s.
When speaking with Sharon and Philip about Jim, the words that came up first when describing Jim was patient, gentle, and kind. And that is how I experienced him as well. Jim truly embodied the Fruits of the Spirit that we read about in Paul’s Letter to the Galatians – love, joy, peace, forbearance (patience), kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
During Sharon and Jim’s 27 years of marriage, Jim loved Sharon’s children and grandchildren as if they were his very own. And as great athlete himself, Grumps loved watching his grandchildren play sports, and was always supportive and loving to them.
When I met him for the first time, it was in the hospital, and though he was very ill, he was extremely gracious and hospitable. I immediately felt the kindness of that Sharon and her family always spoke of.
When Jim died two weeks ago, he left the loving, caring refuge, shelter, and habitation that Sharon had provided him during his illness. But his soul is not left alone to fend for itself. He is now abiding in the dwelling place that Christ prepared for him, which we heard from our Gospel lesson today. So while we grieve his physical absence from us here and now, we can rest assured in our faith that Jim is abiding in a dwelling place where we too will abide one day.
So, as Christians, when we grieve, we do so within that faithful tension between missing our loved ones while also knowing that they are now resting in the holy presence of our living, loving, Triune God, along with the angels, archangels, and all the company of heaven. And we do so in the faithful confidence that, in the word’s of St. Paul, “neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” The love of God in Christ Jesus is what binds us together here today as we go forward from here in the sure confidence that for Jim, life has changed, but not ended. And it is the love of God in Christ Jesus that holds our everlasting bond with those who we love but see no longer. Amen.